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Suck it, pluck it...
In this age of safe sex the need for condoms are a must but some people still have a difficult time buying them. Take my friend, Joe. Our local store carries condoms behind the counter and you need to ask the salesperson to get them. So Joe went up to the salesperson but he was so nervous he could only ask where the straws were. So he bought the straws and left only to have to come back to buy his condoms. Again Joe came into the store and was still so nervous he could only ask where the tweezers were, so he bought them and left. Joe once again had to go back and buy his condoms. So he went up to the salesperson and said, in a low tone, "I need some condoms." The salesperson rang up the sale and said, "First you come in to buy straws, then to buy tweezers, and now to buy condoms..." "...What I want to know is are you going to suck it, pluck it, or fuck it?" 
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