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If You Love
The Original Version: If you love somebody, set her free... If she comes back, she's yours, If she doesn't, she never was.... New, Revised and Updated Versions: * Pessimist: If you love somebody, set her free... If she ever comes back, she's yours, If she doesn't, well, as expected, she never was. * Optimist: If you love somebody, set her free... Don't worry, she will come back. * Suspicious: If you love somebody, set her free... If she ever comes back, ask her why. * Impatient: If you love somebody, set her free... If she doesn't come back within your specific time limit, forget her. * Patient: If you love somebody, set her free... If she doesn't come back, continue to wait until she comes back... * Playful: If you love somebody, set her free... If she comes back, and if you love her still, set her free again, *repeat* * Animal-Rights Activist: If you love somebody, set her free... In fact, all living creatures deserve to be free!! * Lawyer: If you love somebody, set her free... Clause 1a of Paragraph 13a-1 in the second amendment of the Matrimonial Freedom Act clearly states this. * Bill Gates: If you love somebody, set her free... If she comes back, I think we can charge her for re-installation fees and tell her that she's also going to get an upgrade. * Schwarzenegger Fan: If you love somebody, set her free... SHE'LL BE BACK! * Over Possessive Control Freak: If you love somebody, don't set her free. * HR Specialist: If you love somebody, set her free... By offering her VRS and other benefits, then outsource her. * Psychologist: If you love somebody, set her free... If she comes back, her super ego is dominant; If she doesn't come, back her id is supreme; If she doesn't go, she must be crazy. * Somnabulist: If you love somebody, set her free... If she comes back, it's a nightmare; If she doesn't, you must be dreaming. * Finance Expert: If you love somebody, set her free... If she comes back, its time to look for fresh loans; If she doesn't, write her off as an asset gone bad. * Marketing Expert: If you love somebody, set her free... If she comes back, she has brand loyalty; If she doesn't, reposition the brand in new and emerging markets! 
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