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Mexican bandit
The American tourist got the shock of his life when a Mexican with a 6 shooter jumped out from behind a cactus. "Take my money, my car but don't kill me", said the tourist. "I no kill you if you do what I say," said the Mexican. "Just unzip your pants and start masturbating," he ordered. Although shocked, the tourist did what he was told. "Right, now do it again" said the Mexican. The Yank protested but with the gun against his nose, he managed again. "And yet again, Gringo, or I shoot you dead." With sweat running down his brow, the yank managed a final effort and fell exhausted. "Good" said the Mexican, "now you give my sister a ride to the next village." 
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